What Really Knocked Me Out Was Her Cheap Sunglasses

For the past two nights, I've been "playing interior designer." What does that entail, exactly? Well, it involves my driving to Plano to look at paint samples, then painting big test squares on the walls of my parents' guest bathroom. Afterwards, a meal is eaten, I run errands with my mom, and then I arrive home around 9:00 or 9:45, exhausted.

Exhausted, and with new, shiny sunglasses as payment.

I used to buy my sunglasses at Target. I bought the really BIG ones, very 1960s Audrey Hepburn glasses that covered half my face. I also bought cases for the BIG sunglasses at Target.

You see, I have a large purse. There are many things in that large purse. I like to joke that I have such a large purse so I can crawl inside it and stay dry if it rains. My happy hour colleagues - particularly the males - are often awed by what I carry in my purse (travel-size dispensers of toilet seat covers, for instance. Bars aren't that reliable, okay?).

The downside to being prepared for all contingencies is that there are lots of contingency preparatory materials that can bang around in there and scratch up your sunglasses. If your sunglasses don't have a case.

And my sunglasses case bit the dust after a good 3 year run. At the end of which I returned to Target to buy a new case for my big glasses with green frames and smoke-colored lenses, only to find that they no longer carried cases. At all.

After two days, my lenses were scratched beyond repair. I went to a couple of other discount stores to look at sunglasses, but I couldn't find any I liked, so I went to Target and bought a new pair, hoping that if I put my car keys in the pocket every time, my glasses would remain unharmed by the other objects in my bag.

I hoped in vain.

After the first evening of paint-perusing, I asked my mom if she wanted to drop by Macy's, because I needed to get some sunglasses, and I didn't want to go by myself. I'm usually not shy about charging into stores, finding what I want, paying and leaving, but Macy's has decided that their sunglasses are almost all in cases, protected like Fort Knox, and when I last went in there was a guy my age working behind the counter, and I just didn't want to deal with having someone else voice their opinion.

Along with the manned counters, Macy's has also decided that they will stop carrying their $30 sunglasses in favor of $50-$300 glasses. The price you pay for glasses that come with a case, I guess. Except not even the $50 pairs come with a case. No, they have a dinky little bag. The $100+ glasses come with a case.

I found a pair I liked, which cost 6 times more than I used to spend for a pair, but it came with a case, so I prepared to go to the check-out, after which my mom and I would pick out a new purse for her, and then we'd head back to her house so I could come back home. She got in front of me, though, and paid for the sunglasses.

Awesome.

Being the resident interior designer/architect-y person can have its perks. Like fabulously huge sunglasses.